I love the energy of the city, although I needed to learn a few things first.

  1. You will never have a good hair day in Chicago.
  2. Don’t wear loose clothing unless you’re comfortable flashing your nethers every time the wind gusts.
  3. You know you’re in the theater district by the smell of popcorn and pee.
  4. Traffic markings are considered suggestions rather than hard and fast rules.
  5. If you’re going to flip someone the bird, take your mittens off first. More impactful, y’know?